Limited Resources

When you are employed, it’s difficult to see that you are granted with abundant resources, coz you are used to received fixed salary. Hence you can only spent that much. And we tend to continue the limited resources concept with everything that we have: time, smile, kindness to others, and so on.

I believe that in heaven resources are unlimited. But people are not happy because they own everything. They are happy because they can share their lives with others.

So I must believe that God has provided me more than enough, and not to let the idea stick on my head.


Hearing not Listening

You’ve heard about it, but would you listen?

Things that I hate most in my life is when every single words that I said being used against myself. When every statements, that I have, being not acknowledged, turned into the fact that I’m incapable person. Speaking my feelings are becoming more and more hurtful than being silent.

So why complain that I don’t speak much ?

Silence is my own shield. In it I’m saved from every pain of listening painful words.

So why complain that I’m ignoring you ?

Every words that I’d say would become my pain. So, why not ignoring the cause of my pain ?

And yes, every here and there people condemned “eye for an eye” thing. But how do you describe “being left behind” to the person who accused I have never care about herself. How do you describe the feeling of “you ruined my plan for being late” to the person who said it was like that before and there’s nothing to complain about. How to explain that I committed and needed more time and support for my work to the person that accused me I didn’t care about herself, and I should get a better job for my own good. What are the other way to let my feelings being known other than let the person gone through the same pain ?

Maybe that’s why the court calling it “hearing session” and not “listening session”. Because they don’t intend to solve the problem, they just want to see who’s going to feel very bad about themselves after words are spoken.  

Quotes I Like

On abortion and euthanasia:
God gives us free will, but not the right to take others life nor our own life.

On freedom:
Freedom consists not in doing what we like, but in having the right to do what we ought.

On surrendering ourselves:
God owns everything, but not our will. Hence, the most expensive gift that we can offer to Him is our free will.

On keeps falling into the same sins again and again:
A saint is a sinner who keeps trying. Sanctity is like rowing a boat against the current. If you stop, you go backwards with the current.

On the prayer that I read weekly:
A courageous faith which will inspire us to undertake and carry out without hesitation great things for your glory and for the salvation of souls….to kindle everywhere the fires of divine love….to enlighten those who are in darkness and in the shadow of death….to inflame those who are lukewarm…to bring back life to those who are dead in sin….

As translated from ‘Devosi Ekaristi dan Ragam Devosi’ (Eucharist Devotion and Other Devotions) – Archdiosese of Semarang Indonesia. Used as allocutio in Legion of Mary’s presidium meeting, 31 July 2011:

A young mother walked to the church, and found it very quiet. She went to meet the priest, and asked ‘Father, is there any evening mass for this first Friday of the month ?’. ‘No Madam, the only mass for today was in the morning. Anything that I can help ?’. ‘See Father, today is my last day of 9th day novena. This morning my son was so difficult at home so I couldn’t go for morning mass…I’m so disappointed. Just because I miss a single mass, my whole 9 days novena failed. Now my prayer will not be granted’

That’s one of the example of incorrect understanding of devotion practice. Why ? Because the young mother thought that number 9 was the main prerequisites to have her prayer granted. That’s the danger of magical practice in devotion.

Magical practice is a practice which assume that the cause of granted / heard  prayer or source of blessings, comes from certain mantra, correct words, certain time, certain sacred items / charm, numbers or certain places. The truth is that the only cause to have a prayer granted or heard is God only. Whether it’s granted or not, heard or not, is purely depends on God only, and not because of the correct words, mantra, or certain time. 

Devotion prayer should be motivated with love of God and surrendering ourselves to God’s will. After that let God’s kindness and wisdom works on our problems.

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